Thursday, May 22

TRY IT

Ada sorang reader nih email kat Ujang pasal diri dia.... Maaf lah . Ujang lambat bagi respond sebab sibuk sikit dengan kerja...

The sun raised and I found something that felt different that something was new a feeling. I thought I lost along time ago as my salty tears fell onto her beautiful dress but she didn't seem to care. she held me in her arms that felt so comforting and I couldn't help but cry now. I undertand why they go to her. her comfort. her words.

even when she doesn't talk she's there just to be there for anyone. I wish I trusted her the first time we met. Then I wouldn't have been put threw so much pain as I am now. when the sun had set my pain was gone. and i felt and ease for once sleeping in her arms that kept me safe all night long...

What can Ujangmd says::

You hint at a lot. While it is not necessary to always make everything to your reader, consider giving us something we can latch on to, like a clue about who "her" is or what caused the pain. Also you start by mentioning the sun and then don't mention it again. This leaves me with an incomplete feeling.

Posted by Ujang_MD :: 5/22/2008 12:07:00 PM :: 0 Comments:

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