Tuesday, April 7

IM HAPPY

Yes, i do indeedy believe i am happy. Im happy in the parts of my life that matter to me the most right now.

Thanks for all those wonderful comments. math or not, sometimes you just gotta figure it out your own way. Someone asked if i read all the comments and yes i do. I moderate them to make sure i do.

You know, ive gotta be happy because if things hadnt happened how they happened i wouldnt be where i am now and looking forward towards a great future with a great person soon.


I think when we regret things, we look at all the good things that could have come from different decisions instead of the potentially disastrous things that happen every day that might have happened and we have no control over.


So im thankful im here and that nothing disastrous has happened. Im happy i went where i went this summer. And im happy i met who i met and i love who i love. And im happy im experiencing this all now (sad times and all of it) because if i wasnt then i wouldnt have done all those things and i wouldnt have great things to look forward to.


So yes, i am happy.

Posted by Ujang_MD :: 4/07/2009 08:10:00 AM :: 6 Comments:

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Monday, April 6

I HATE PEOPLE WHO THINK THEIR TOP SHIT

Oh my goodness im soo angry right now.. well not really but anoyed and pissed over something so stupid too but arghhhhh.. Basically right i really really don't like people who think their top shit and know everything and their the best rah rah rah and everything it just pisses me off to no end.
Like seriously who really likes these kinda people? i mean you present them something and ask for their advice and they totally kill you with critisms.. and then what anoys me more is that i don't believe their background or cridentials shows that they are an expert in this particular area... Oh my gosh it's like the more they rant on about it the more you start to question what the hell is going on here.

For example i will give you a very simple example that is totally not related to this. Everyone that knows me, knows i've been playing tennis for over 9 years, so much so i've won 4 titles, 1 runners up and numerous Semi-final finishes, achieved the highest grade possible for Jr.Tennis Competition and ultimately scored myself a job being an part time assisstant tennis coach.. however I FEEL that if someone told me something tennis related and made me think wtf?! i wouldn't go verbally rape him with all the reasons why he's wrong but i would think first and then actually accept it if it's kinda reasonable and makes sense, cause i know that in tennis what may work for one person does not particular work for another person. Additionally i really hate the fact that they go 'rah rah rah you suck, your stupid, your dumb, but really honestly, truly, your work is great! xoxo keep it up =)' WHAT A BITCH! im going to freakin blastomise you if you ever say that shit again..


Maybe im being harsh.. but i don't think soo, because anyways so something happen to me today yeah and i was like hmm okay, and then when i asked to give an example and SHOW me in person all this stupid idiot could do was firstly say 'oh well im tired, oh well the equipment is dodgy, oh well im a bit sick but i can try' and then when i witnessed it i was like wtf.. that sounds and looks freakin awful.. And even if i were wrong... just saying.. and actually there might be a high possibility too (opps) just like being nicer wouldn't kill either. Like seriously you have attitude problems or something sheesh. Your wrong! your gone! don't ever talk me again! GRR!!

Posted by Ujang_MD :: 4/06/2009 08:28:00 AM :: 0 Comments:

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Sunday, April 5

WHY PUSH MYSELF?

As a recovering stammerer, its so important that I continue to keep on top of my speech. In the past few weeks I have been sloppy and not been as disciplined as I would have liked. However I have no problem with this anymore as long as I continue to push myself and NEVER hold back when dealing with worlds, sounds or situations. My mindset is spot on! ARGGHH....

My advice to anyone who stammers would be to do one thing every day that is a challenge. This might not be a big challenge but could be a small one. My challenge today is to use a 5 second pause when speaking to a out of control stammerer shortly....go for is and dont hold back because if you go for it, this will open up opportunities you would never thought exsisted.

Posted by Ujang_MD :: 4/05/2009 06:01:00 PM :: 1 Comments:

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Saturday, April 4

REALATIONSHIPS

VERY BUSY... ARGHH.................................................

Last year, I was drowning in guilt for what I’d done. I felt like I had ruined everyone’s lives. What I did was wrong, and there are better ways of fixing your life than cheating and lying. But sometimes when you’re too scared to change your life, and something so sad is growing and consuming you, but you can’t put a name on it... you fu**k shit up.

Like a game of musical chairs, we all switched places, and yes it is still uncomfortable as new chairs tend to be, but I think we all ended up in places that make us happier as individuals. Sometimes I still feel sad for the past that had been so beautiful and good on many levels... but as each day passes, I wake up feeling more whole. More me.

Posted by Ujang_MD :: 4/04/2009 08:23:00 AM :: 0 Comments:

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Friday, April 3

TERIMA KASIH MAKCIK ZAINUNG

Alhamdulillah.. hampir 45hari lagi Ujang akan habiskan Master Ujang... Insyaallah pertengahan bulan 5 Ujang akan dapat apa yang Ujang inginkan selama lebih 2 tahun menunggu.. Ujang tak sabar menunggu detik di mana Ujang akan terima segulung Master Microbiology (Virology). Insyaallah....

Ujang ingin berterima kasih pada Makcik Zainung.. dialah yang selalu bagi semangat pada Ujang... Belajar katanya.. hanya pendidikan orang akan lebih hormat pada pada kita... Akhirnya Ujang sahut cabaran mak.. dan akhirnya... Insyaallah...

Semalam Ujang mendengar lagu Nasyid... Buatmu Ibu.. tersentuh hati ini... Liriknya amat bermakna.. tak sedar airmata mengalir mengenangkan jasa Makcik Zainung.. terima kasih buat Mak....

Ibu bergenang airmata ku

Terbayang wajahmu yang redup sayu

Kudusnya kasih yang engkau hamparkan

Bagaikan laut yang tak bertepian

Biarpun kepahitan telah engkau rasakan

Tidak pun kau merasa jemu

Mengasuh dan mendidik kami semua anakmu

Dari kecil hingga dewasa

Hidupmu kau korban

Biarpun dirimu yang telah terkorban

Tak dapat ku balasi akan semua ini

Semoga Tuhan memberkati

Kehidupanmu ibu

Ibu kau ampunilah dosaku

Andainya pernah menghiris hatimu

Restumu yang amatlah ku harapkan

Kerana di situ letak syurgaku

Tabahnya melayani kenakalan anakmu

Mengajarku erti kesabaran

Kau bagai pelita di kala aku kegelapan

Menyuluh jalan kehidupan

Kasih sayangmu sungguh bernilai

Itulah harta yang kau berikan

Ibu kau ampunilah dosaku

Andainya pernah menghiris hatimu

Restumu yang amatlah ku harapkan

Kerana di situ letak syurgaku

Tabahnya melayani kenakalan anakmu

Mengajarku erti kesabaran

Kau bagai pelita di kala aku kegelapan

Menyuluh jalan kehidupan

Kasihanilah Tuhan

Ibu yang telah melahirkan diriku

Bagaikan kasih ibu sewaktu kecilku

Moga bahgia ibu di dunia dan di akhirat sana

Moga bahgia ibu di dunia dan di akhirat sana

Posted by Ujang_MD :: 4/03/2009 08:15:00 AM :: 0 Comments:

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Thursday, April 2

SOFTEST SMILE

Kemana bintang beribu...

Dimalam ini.. tiada satu pun....

Yang kelihatan kecuali kelam....

When i lay there

When your being all of that!

I stop and think; of you, your voice, and ideas.

Your an inspiration.

Warm and gentle- inspiration.

Posted by Ujang_MD :: 4/02/2009 06:03:00 AM :: 0 Comments:

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Wednesday, April 1

WHEN DOES IT STOP...

The pain of missing, remembering and not forgetting. Is a sick, silly, stupid joke.


That crushes your lungs, every night, every day.


I no longer remember, how i used to breathe before.


You left, You left... but me hanging. Barely living, in a souless body.

"Never"


The answer is.

Posted by Ujang_MD :: 4/01/2009 05:30:00 AM :: 0 Comments:

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